I used to be a real nerd for technology. Almost anything computer-related was fascinating to me, and I was really into consumer electronics*. I kept up with the latest releases from Intel and AMD, “built” computers from components that I couldn’t afford via NewEgg, and became an expert Windows user with nothing but exposure.
And, of course, I liked video games. A lot. I really loved E3, “industry” talk, and making predictions about future games and systems (I even successfully predicted that the Wii would make Nintendo stock very valuable; and it did–from $15 to $75 in less than a year). I have estimated that I’ve spent over 10,000 hours of my life playing them (which apparently does not necessarily make me an expert).
Well, I’m 27 now. I just finished a 6-month sabbatical in which I trained myself to becomes a front end developer, and a few weeks ago I became employed. It’s 9:30 on a Saturday and I want to get on the computer and have fun, like I often have. Problem is, nothing seems interesting. I’m completely bored by the idea of playing a video game. And that, in itself, is interesting.
For years already, my desire to play video games has been declining. I see new games that simultaneously look really cool and incite no excitement in me whatsoever. Sometimes I browse Steam’s catalog, discover a few gems, and then simply walk away. To be honest, I’m thankful. This opens up my time to be used in better ways.
Now, it seems my disillusionment is spreading to technology in general. I just looked at some awesome notebooks and 4k curved monitors out of my own volition, and turned away completely bored. Amazingly fast hardware is neat, and nothing more.
So what? I’m only 27, right? Sadly, I think too much. Extrapolate this series of disillusionment into the rest of my life, and I can’t help but to wonder, or maybe fear, that one day every joy of life will be dulled. It sounds insufferable.
Is this, perhaps, one of the reasons people die? Are people supposed to become disillusioned with life? Or maybe I am simply falling out of love with this world: 1 John 2:15-17.
I’m interested to see what happens next.
* I must note an important exception. I hated Apple’s philosophy of delivering a simple product that performed well and cost a premium above an equivalent product. I didn’t like simplicity. I wanted the power to do what I wanted to do, not what Apple wanted me to do. Most of all, though, I hate iTunes. That’s one passion of mine that hasn’t completely died yet.